People with narcissistic behaviors unknowingly isolate themselves. (© koldunova_anna – stock.adobe.com)
In a nutshell
- Research involving over 77,000 participants found that individuals with narcissistic traits experience more social exclusion in their daily lives and are actively ostracized more frequently by others.
- The study identified a cyclical relationship: narcissistic behaviors lead to more social exclusion, while experiences of exclusion can fuel the development of more narcissistic traits over time.
- Workplace ostracism of narcissistic individuals often takes subtle forms, such as being left off email chains or having suggestions ignored during meetings, which can trigger defensive responses and create further isolation.
BASEL, Switzerland — Narcissists may believe they’re the center of attention, but research suggests they’re more likely to be left out of the group entirely. A new study from the University of Basel in Switzerland reveals that individuals with higher levels of narcissistic traits not only report experiencing more social exclusion in their daily lives but are also actively ostracized more frequently by others.
The research team looked at what they call “grandiose narcissism.” These are the people who think they’re better than everyone else, expect special treatment, and need constant praise. We all know someone like this: maybe it’s the coworker who hijacks every meeting to talk about themselves, or the friend who gets upset when they’re not getting enough attention.
“Feeling ostracized is a subjective experience based on the perception of social cues by the individual. Some may be intentionally ostracized, while others may merely believe they are being excluded when that’s not the case,” said lead author Christiane Büttner, Ph.D., in a statement.
This wasn’t just a small study. The research team looked at over 77,000 people across seven different studies. They started by examining data from 1,592 people in Germany who answered questions about narcissism and feeling left out. The results were clear: the more narcissistic traits someone had, the more they reported feeling excluded from groups.
To dig deeper, the researchers had 323 people use a special smartphone app for two weeks. Participants logged whenever they felt left out, whether it was something obvious like not being invited to a party, or something subtle like feeling ignored during a conversation. Once again, the narcissists reported feeling excluded more often.
The study, published Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, found three main reasons why this happens. First, narcissists are super sensitive to any hint of being left out. They might see a delayed text response as a deliberate snub, or think not being asked about a minor decision means people are plotting against them.
Second, people actively avoid hanging out with narcissists. In experiments with over 2,500 participants, people consistently chose to stay away from those showing narcissistic traits. It’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy: their behavior pushes people away, leading to actual exclusion.
Third, it’s a vicious cycle. The researchers looked at 14 years of data from New Zealand, covering over 72,000 people. They found that when someone’s narcissistic behaviors increased, they experienced more exclusion the following year. But here’s the kicker: being excluded actually made their narcissistic traits worse the next year.
“Narcissism may contribute to social exclusion, but ostracism itself can also fuel the development of narcissistic traits,” explains Büttner.
The research team identified two main ways narcissism shows up. Some people constantly seek admiration, like the coworker who won’t stop bragging about their achievements or the friend who floods social media with carefully staged photos of their perfect life. Rivalry behaviors are more antagonistic, characterized by putting others down, reacting aggressively when others receive attention or actively competing for status and recognition.
In one interesting experiment, participants watched short videos of strangers and decided if they’d want to work with them. Without any background information, people consistently avoided those showing narcissistic traits. It shows how quickly we can spot these behaviors, even in brief encounters.
This pattern shows up a lot in workplaces. Narcissistic individuals might be left off email chains, not invited to lunch with coworkers, or have their ideas ignored in meetings. When this happens, they often react defensively, which only makes things worse.
For organizations and social groups, these findings suggest that simply excluding difficult people isn’t the answer. It might actually make their behavior worse over time, creating bigger problems for everyone.
“If people with high narcissistic traits are more likely to feel and be excluded, this could contribute to escalating tensions in workplaces or social groups. At the same time, their heightened sensitivity to exclusion might make them more likely to react aggressively,” says Büttner.
The research tells us something important: narcissism and social exclusion feed into each other. When we understand this pattern, we can better handle conflicts in our workplaces and social circles. Instead of just pushing difficult people away, we might need to find better ways to deal with these challenging personality traits.
Paper Summary
Methodology
The researchers employed a multi-method approach combining large-scale surveys, daily experience sampling using smartphone apps, laboratory experiments, and long-term follow-up studies. Participants ranged from university students to nationally representative samples from multiple countries. The experience sampling study had participants report real-time instances of feeling excluded over two weeks, while laboratory studies used standardized social exclusion scenarios and video-based assessments to measure how people respond to individuals with varying levels of narcissistic traits.
Results
The findings consistently showed that individuals scoring higher on narcissism measures reported more frequent experiences of ostracism across all study types. In experimental settings, participants were more likely to exclude individuals who displayed narcissistic traits, especially those related to competitive and aggressive behaviors. The 14-year longitudinal data revealed that increases in narcissistic traits predicted more experiences of exclusion in subsequent years, and vice versa.
Limitations
The researchers note that their work primarily focused on grandiose narcissism rather than other forms of narcissistic personality traits. Additionally, some studies relied on self-reported experiences of ostracism, which could be influenced by perception biases. The video-based studies were also relatively brief, potentially limiting their ability to capture more nuanced social dynamics.
Discussion and Takeaways
This research provides a comprehensive framework for understanding how personality traits can lead to negative social experiences. The findings suggest that interventions targeting narcissistic behaviors might help prevent social exclusion, while also highlighting the importance of addressing ostracism to prevent the development of more pronounced narcissistic traits over time.
Funding and Disclosures
The research was supported by the Swiss National Science Foundation and the Templeton Religion Trust. The authors declared no conflicts of interest.
Publication Information
The study titled “Narcissists’ Experience of Ostracism” was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (2025) by authors Christiane M. Büttner, Selma C. Rudert, Elianne A. Albath, Chris G. Sibley, and Rainer Greifeneder, representing institutions from the University of Basel, University of Kaiserslautern-Landau, and University of Auckland.
